Daughter Outside the Formwork
Introdution
It started in high school. As my gender identity gradually took form, my father stopped initiating conversations with me.
All the way till his passing, I never delivered the words I wanted to express to him as his daughter.
My father had spent most of his life working on construction sites. Formwork, or timber molds that keep concrete in shape, was part of the labor that allowed him to support our family. It also became a thread for me to understand his body.
Under the bright sun, I carried formwork on my back and kept moving for an hour, letting the wooden grains, the heat, and the weight enter my body as I walked into the silence that endured between me and my father.
Formwork was my father’s tool to support our family. It was also like the beam that barricaded between our views on gender.
Now that words could not reach him, I use my body to listen to the traces my father left behind. Finally, I could revisit our relationship as myself; beyond the binary, I arrive closer than ever as my father’s daughter.
Comment From the Judge : Eno Chen
This work creates a strong connection between its visual presentation and written narrative.
Formwork, commonly seen on construction sites, carries a rough-and-tumble and masculine undertone. It stands in for the deceased father, as well as his lack of understanding and acceptance during his lifetime.
On a physical and symbolic level, the formwork presses heavily against the feminine-presenting body. Yet on a spiritual level, the feminine body carries and raises up that machismo and the complicated father-child relationship.
Her thin-strap top and mesh head-covering expresses femininity. The body is exposed as it counters the weight on its back, yet the image remains visually light and soft. In this way, the work transforms the opposition between masculinity and femininity, allowing different qualities of life to coexist.